November 1, 2012- the beginning
I am 29 years old and weigh 240 pounds. Been battling the “bulge “for now about 14+ years. Have I ever been skinny, hell to the no! I’ve been a work in progress since, well forever. I have never managed to consecutively lose 20 pounds. I have however, put on numerous pounds of fat over the years. I’ve wasted money with LA weight loss. I’ve checked out Weight watchers, I’ve googled numerous success stories. Yet here I am again in 2012 (and the world may end next month, meaning that I will die a fatty, just saying). I got married, went to school, had a kid, and all of the other jazz. I’ve consistently managed to let myself, my husband and now my son down. I can’t shop in a regular person store, I cannot wear anything from a dipper store without it either being unstitched, with the right amount of fabric or paying hundreds of dollars to have it custom made. I have settled so many times due to my weight issues. Also on some sort of unconscious level I have let people walk all over me, treat me like crap because I was like hey I’m fat, if I fight back they might make a fat joke. My boobs are all fat and now cause of pregnancy they hang way lower than they need to on a 29 year old. My two best friends are overweight, what can I say misery loves company. One struggles just the way I do, one struggles but somehow finds a way to make me feel more shitier than I do. Can I shop at places like Lulu Lemon, Banana republic, sirens, mexx, le chateau, NO of course not. They only serve people who are like a size 6 or under. I have ADDITION ELLE and Pennington’s. The fat people store. They carry ugly clothing, and are way more expensive than normal people stores. Why? Cause it takes more material to make our clothes, obviously, duh!
So what have you done about it? Absolutely jack shit. Excuse my language. I have fat hanging off on my body in parts that most people don’t even think fat exists. I eat all day, I drink pop all day and to top it off I don’t work out at the gym. I have a gym membership, but I just choose to donate that money to them, because I haven’t stepped into their facility since, oh maybe June. A part of me is wondering why I`m blogging. Accountability.. looking for resources… whatever the reason, here I am. Let`s do this!